[2016] First Comes Love by Emily Goodwin

Author:Emily Goodwin [Goodwin, Emily]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781515910350
Amazon: B01BN5LB7Q
Barnesnoble: B01BN5LB7Q
Publisher: Black Ink
Published: 2016-02-10T07:00:00+00:00

Chapter 14

Noah

I BALL MY fists, muscles tense and ready for the fight. If you asked what we are fighting about, I couldn’t tell you. I’m too drunk.

Fuck.

I went to The Roadhouse with every intention of letting Joey know I’m still alive and well, and that I’ll be a dad in the winter. I had every intention of leaving after one drink.

Yet here I am, drunk and picking fights, just like before. Things aren’t just like before. I know that, even as wasted as I am.

The first punch is thrown and I duck out of the way. There is still time to end this, to walk away and go home to Lauren. But I’ve never walked away from a fight. I can’t do it now.

I hurl my arm forward, fist colliding with the side of the guy I’m fighting’s face. His name isn’t known; all I know is he did something to piss me off. Or maybe he hasn’t.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t on edge, if all this baby stuff hadn’t rattled me. Because it has. Baby aside, the more time I spend with Lauren, the clearer it is to me that I’m more in love with her than I thought.

And that fucking terrifies me.

I don’t want to mess this up. I don’t want to hurt her. And I don’t want to be a bad father, because that’s the worst thing I can do to her, right? Let her down and not take care of our child.

I rarely ever know what the fuck I’m doing in life. I race through things at a hundred miles an hour, and, somehow, they work out. Well, most of the time. There have been bumps along the way.

But when I know what I want, I get it. I’ve never had expectations for anyone else. Expect nothing, invest nothing, lose nothing. It’s been my philosophy for as long as I can remember. Have fun and fuck while I can. Live it up.

No expectations.

No rules.

No chance of getting hurt.

No chance of getting stuck in a loveless marriage with a child I didn’t want, a child I don’t want to be around. No chance of turning into my own father. A father whose emotions ranged from numb and drunk to angry and violent, with not much in between.

The guy stumbles back and crashes into a table, knocking beer bottles to the floor. Broken glass scatters along the ground. Fuck. Joey won’t press charges against me for damaging the bar, but I can’t avoid everything. Drunk and disorderly, public nuisance, the cops can get me for something.

I can’t do that to Lauren. I can’t do that to our baby.

Something inside of me protests as I whirl around and storm behind the bar. Something else inside of me trembles and I fear this is all for naught. I am completely in love with Lauren Winters, more so now than ever. If she doesn’t love me back, all this change will be for nothing.

But I’d be damned if I didn’t try.

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